Rewrite the descriptions/email for my Personal Development blog.

TOTAL REWRITE. (#1 focus = call to action)

I love the premise of your website so I was drawn to it immediately. I feel like I understood what you wanted to say but, truth is, most people browsing a new blog don't want to spend time reading the 'about' or the intros so I kept the sentences short. There are many calls for action and I tried to highlight the idea of a community as I feel that the consumer needs to feel like THEY are gaining value rather than you. As an ambitious Cambridge Uni Undergrad, I created something that I would read and be emoted by. If you want to collaborate further, please do get in touch.