$450 - WORK RIGHT NOW - Best PHP Programmer

I own a programming company. I am looking for a FULL time PHP programmer who can work for me dedicated not on anyone else project but only for me. He should know PHP for 7+ years , CSS, AJax, javascript etc.. I have lots of projects. I will work directly with him and he needs to update me every 15 minutes on what is completed. I need a guy who is extremely fast because we have a lot of projects that need to be done. Rules 1. I need a programmer who can work 10AM to 7:30PM california time. If you dont know what time that is google it to see what time it is now. 2. You must be extremely fast and have 7+ years experience. If you do not please dont bid and don't lie becuase you will not be able to do the work. Something that takes other programmer 2 mins to finish willl take you 1 hour. ONly bid if you have 7+ years experience. 3. You must be able to update me every 15 mins on what is done. Since you have 7+ years experience I expect a lot done very fast. So every 15 mins or so I should see things done and I will give you the next task. We have lots of projects so I will be giving you many things to program. Pay is $15 (9.5 hours) * 30 days = $450 per month every month If you can all of the above bid $30 as a trail run for 2 days and answer the question below. 1. list all of the programming language you know and how many years you know each.. from php to css to javascript to ajax, etc.. i have a lot of different projects o ineed to know all languages you know and how many years do you know each. 2. speed... i need someone extremely fast if you are too slow dont bid... if i give you a form with 30 fields to enter into mysql database how long will it take you to get it working with mysql? (no design.. design is all done and no validation.. just insert code into mysql for 30 fields how long will it take you?) 3. can you work full time 9.5+ hours a day on my project and no one else project? and update me every 15 mins on what is done? 4. i have lots of project can u start now?